First, I brought you this. Well, I didn’t actually bring it to you, I just linked to it.
And now, more awesome quotes from jobs past. This time from Folio Magazine, many moons ago. It’s a miracle any of us survived our own toxic sarcasm.
We got the cream of the crap. — Matt
The two things in the world that most closely approximate the wishes of the devil - satan himself - are Clear Channel Communications and the war on drugs. — Shelton
Never wear loud shoes to a poetry reading, unless it’s part of your act. — Kat
Just because you have a crystal hanging around your neck, that doesn’t make you a poet — Flora
I may be ugly, but i’m NOT smart — Matt
I am NOT gonna have a dumparoni sandwich! — Ellen
Pubic hair is the most disgusting thing in the world – next to black, tarry stools. — John
I think I’m mentally ill… my brain’s gonna throw up. — Kat
You want to feelio my deelio? — John
Bullshit’s one word, right? — Anne
She’s got a lumpy smile and lymphnodes like a jersey cow. — Flora
It’s like porn, but for weedheads. — Walter
I’ll try anything once. then throw it up. — Matt
Select all. Convert to crap. — Mitch
You’re suffering from secondhand meat. — Walter
You should eat. you’ve got a gaping wound. — Flora
This manatee has a sexual organ visible. — Matt
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